Zen and the Art of Rickey
Leaving the monastery last Monday afternoon, I felt quite rejuvenated. "This was more refreshing than I thought!" I even felt that, as we were getting back into the city, I would not be able to survive reinsertion into the concrete enclave that is New York City and the masses of bodies huddled in tight spaces.
Well, non-dramatically, like one of my companions said, getting back to city life was easy: you pretty much drop into the rat race and run (or walk really fast if you are surrounded by clueless tourists on 34th Street -- that's my second most hated spot on the NYC map, just next to Times Square).
My peaceful monastic existence was also shattered by the realization that I am needed by a few people in city with dire computer needs. For the second time now, upon returning from a trip, I am greeted by people demanding my attention. Before I could even assess any of my experience over the weekend, I had 5 "urgent" messages on my cellphone. I thought I could do a couple of tasks really quickly before I write about my retreat to get it over and done with, but then the result was lack of sleep and eventually it sucked the life blood out of me. Reflection: The purpose of living in New York is to get the life blood sucked out of you.
And so, begrudgingly, on the morning after, I write about how sucky it is to come back to New York City life after spending 3 peaceful nights in a monastery in the Catskills.
I made it a point not to bring any of my work or online life with me while at the retreat: cellphone off, Blackberry off, blocking all thoughts of Big Brother, etc. However there was one thing that I learned: I have to take a spring break from the Sanjaya Universe. It was a bit annoying that thoughts of Sanjaya followed me even as I meditated and practiced yogic breathing in an isolated patch of land. I was expecting a bit more time for myself, then all of a sudden I would think, how would Sanjaya look in these really cool monastic robes? Or will he enjoy the all-vegetarian diet? Or has Sanjaya ever done a downward-facing-dog? I even bought stuff in the gift shop specifically for him. It's too ridiculous. So that was one of my points of "enlightenment". Take it easy on the Sanjaya stuff for a while. It's quite obvious that his peeps don't truly give that much of a BLEEP. What's up with all those questionable comments from family members, and just the lack of straight up gratitude? There's a reason why there are so many Fanjayas who visit rickey.org -- and it's not because I am a crazy obsessed fan. At the time when there was darkness on the Web on news about Sanjaya, we were the sole beacon of light. Sure Sanjaya had fans in Vote for the Worst and the forums, but we were 100% sold on what was good in Sanjaya: that he could sing and had a sweet voice, had a great spirit and was refreshing to watch (not the lovable trouble-maker VFTW adores him for, or being just the pretty face that little girls and POLs adore and which will surely be replaced next season). Have I just been naive all this time? I'm going to take time to talk to Sanjaya if I see him again because either they have no idea what happened here in the last few months, or they truly just don't give a BLEEP. And so knowing that, why should I let them consume me? Take a baby step back from the Sanjaya Universe, look around, re-asses. Repeat.
There were also a few "buzzwords" that the participants were floating around during the weekend: "live in the moment" and "you choose your reality". Isn't that a line from the winning song of this year's American Idol? Living in the moment is nice, although now I wish my moment had more trees as I look out my window. I think there are more pressing stuff to do right now than worry about what will happen next year. A bridge collapsed in Minnesota recently -- I didn't see that coming, did you? And I just realized yesterday that I have a bridge crossing trauma for fear of it collapsing unexpectedly. Life would be so much better if we were warned of these things, but we cannot predict everything. So better to work on stuff now, than worry about later. Now is the time to write about the retreat because the peeps want to know!
Choosing your reality is quite funny, mostly because there is truth in it. I think it applies to contentious things in our lives. Ashley Ferl: "Sanjaya is a dreamboat!" Ozzy Osborne: "Sanjaya is a weirdo!" Sanjaya: "What is happening to me?" I'll try to be more aware of this in my daily dealings. But better to avoid conflict than try to argue whose version of reality is better.
Here are a few more pictures from the retreat. Will write more things in the future when they come back to me. What is the sound of one hand clapping?
Namaste!
Billy Monks my massage therapist:
Anna, shiatsu specialist (she's strong -- I thought she was going to break my back, but I survived):
Robin, my yoga instructor:
