The X Factor - Recap - Live Blog - 09/20/2012
Hey guys, Nick Roman here to live blog the fourth episode of the season. Please don't hesitate to add your thoughts to the comments. I love reading them, and try to respond where I can. Lord knows, it's a hell of a lot better watching along with other people. Seriously.
WILLIE JONES, 17, IS UP FIRST
-His family has made a 14-hour drive to be here today. Demi immediately compliments him on his Fresh Prince-style fashion...which makes it all the more surprising when he sings "Your Man" by Josh Turner.
-If he winds up being even half as popular as Scotty McCreery over on Idol, then we might as well start putting up posters for Baby Lock Them Doors II: Nuts of Wonder.
-LA loved it, Demi and Britney are pleasantly surprised, and Simon thinks he has an outstanding recording voice and considers this a day to remember. He gets a "yes" from each judge. Willie Jones advances to boot camp.
-Personally, I didn't care much for the audition, but the disconnect between his appearance and his singing voice, coupled with his inherently likable personality (the kid is humble and family-oriented), means he might wind up being a force to be reckoned with.
-As we come back from break, we meet an elderly man named Kelvin who works on lawnmower handles. The man is basically incomprehensible, speaking in a quick-paced jumble. His singing is even worse. Britney is scared she's related to him. All judges say "no" in a Southern accent, and off he goes.
JULIA BULLOCK, 18, IS UP NEXT
-Julia is part of a band, but is auditioning on her own, since her band isn't a vocal group. Her ex-boyfriend/bandmate Christian seems bitter about it, saying the band is pretty much broken up as of this moment.
-He's pretty clearly still in love with her, even fighting back tears when interviewed about losing her to The X Factor.
-Still, during her chat with the judges, she states that her bandmates are passionate enough to go on in music without her, which makes me think she didn't hear a thing her bandmates actually said.
-But none of that matters, because she sings "Pumped Up Kicks" and gives probably my favorite audition of all four episodes so far. She's got that hipster/indie sound of Jelena Jensen and the showmanship of CeCe Frey but without the sob story of the former or the cloyingly irritating personality of the latter.
-All four judges love her, so it's a Yes x4. Julia Bullock advances to boot camp.
-And now we're auditioning Pepsi Flavors. It's the only way my ass would ever find its way to The X Factor stage. (Flashforward to season 3 of X Factor USA: in walks joke auditioner Nick Roman in leopard print leotard).
KRYSTEN COLON, 21, IS UP NEXT
-She sings an Adele song and, thankfully, it's not one of the obvious ones: "Don't You Remember."
-She's good, but she's terrified, completely thrown by nerves. Simon says it's a shame because doing an Adele song makes her come across as a sound-alike. He gives her a chance to go off and prepare another song, a twist on a classic, he suggests. Poor girl, she sincerely looks desperate for approval - she actually can sing. A little confidence would do her wonders.
-And he's doing it all for his 4 year-old son, who's never heard him sing before. He wants his boy to be proud of him when he grows up. This whole bit is set to "Red" by Daniel Merriweather, so bonus points on using one of my absolute favorite songs.
-He sings "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen, and this could easily be great or pear-shaped, with hardly any room for middle ground.
-It actually DOES start out "middle ground," but quickly graduates to "pretty damn great" by the end. Doesn't best the Rufus Wainwright or Jeff Buckley versions of the world (thank you, commenter waynocoaster, for reminding me of what a great version of that song can truly sound like). But it's still damn great for a first-time audition.
-LA calls "Hallelujah" one of the greatest songs ever written, while Demi calls it one of the best performances of that song she's heard, adding that even God was rocking out (upon hearing the thunder roll from outside). Simon calls it one of the most brilliant auditions he's heard. All four judges say yes. Jeffrey Adam Gutt advances to boot camp.
-And we're back from break and it looks like the beginning of a "bad contestants" montage, but then the storm hits, and the arena is suddenly leaking water and the thunder is making a proper racket outside.
-Never mind, it is a "bad contestants" montage after all. These people should all form a group together and call themselves The Hot Mess Collective.
KRYSTEN COLON IS BACK
-And she really should throttle whoever told her to sing "I Have Nothing." It would be hard enough to sing for even the most capable performer, but Krysten is beyond terrified. And it's a shame, because it wasn't bad starting out, but that's the thing about Whitney songs: they sound easy to sing when you're listening to them.
-She tries to argue with the judges that she has The X Factor, but it's no good. All four say "no." And just like that...
KRYSTEN
IS.
PISSED.
-She goes positively NUCLEAR backstage, knocking over items over by the makeup mirror, arguing with her family (who are trying to talk her off the ledge, saying she's embarrassing herself, and confiding in the camera that, hey, nobody promised her a "yes," much less four of them). The crew calls security to have her escorted from the building as she goes about wielding a chair, primed and ready to throw. What looked to be an engaging story of hope and promise has essentially devolved into an episode of Jenny Jones circa 1996.
And I LOVE it.
-We come back from break and...the show is OVER?!
I just realized I never once looked at the clock this entire hour.
Like that, we're getting the same preview for next week that we seem to keep getting at the end of every episode: namely the promise of awesome things happening that never seem to come, and insanely talented people who are supposed to change the face of reality singing competitions forever...yet whom we never see. This show is giving me Talent Show Blue Balls. I think we only saw three people advance to boot camp. Madness.
Anyway, I'll stick around for a bit longer to chat, but that's it for me. Until next time (whenever that may be, for me). It's been great, you guys!