Sanjaya Malakar - People Magazine

I'm so sad!

(Many things...)

While researching for Sanjaya-stuff on the Internet, I discovered that Sanjaya was not as loved by the cast as I thought. That's why he seemed to hesitate when asked in his interviews about the other Idols. Instead of "I'm close to so-and-so", he just says "we're a family". I was expecting him to say "Jordin is my best friend!" immediately, but he doesn't.

Apparently, Gina Glocksen publicly snubbed Sanjaya when she was eliminated. Sanjaya walked up to her but she immediately turned away. This was not shown on TV. Also, again, not shown on TV, on the night Haley was eliminated, no one consoled Sanjaya when Seacrest was toying with him whether he was safe or not (while everyone was friendly with each other). Sanjaya was seen holding his hands to his face alone on the bench and the others didn't care.

I didn't know that there was so much resentment towards Sanjaya from the Idols. I'm crushed.

And of course all the post-Idol stuff is scaring me. In the few paparazzi videos I've seen they sound like they truly despise that they have to get pictures of him because he's so popular. It's so awful.

And Momjaya looks so angry.

I'm not even eloquent now. I'm just sad. I'm totally not handling this very well. I think I should stop blogging for a bit and take a breather.

I'm so sad!